she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
