is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
