Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
