How'd it feel making her break her religion?
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
vagina is talking i cant
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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