Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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