Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
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