Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize