what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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