We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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