there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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