Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize