I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Never joke about your clitoris.
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