That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
