Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
