I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
