all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
He told me they were just razor bumps!
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize