i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
