I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Randomize