His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
