Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
