I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
