did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
