the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
