I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
