CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
