I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
