she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
