so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
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I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
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this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
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