what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize