ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Randomize
