the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
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