he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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