Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
