Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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