Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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