We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
sarcasm needs its own font
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
You've changed since you got that strap on
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
