Texts From Last Night

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  (281): View more from Texas

  How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend

  (936): View more from Texas

  Get a boyfriend

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  (281): How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend (936): Get a boyfriend http://tfl.nu/1049
  Replies (3) Good night (751) Bad night (1065)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.

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  (702): Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks. http://tfl.nu/8gmt
  Replies (40) Good night (1003) Bad night (3629)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  i puked in the mini-firdge

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  we don't have a mini-fridge?

  (917): View more from New York City

  bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that

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  (917): i puked in the mini-firdge (201): we don't have a mini-fridge? (917): bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that http://tfl.nu/0lys
  Replies (4) Good night (3249) Bad night (871)
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  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.

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  (506): I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision. http://tfl.nu/nkkw
  Replies (28) Good night (4575) Bad night (1470)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.

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  (216): My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak. http://tfl.nu/lf5p
  Replies (2) Good night (1001) Bad night (1792)
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  (575): View more from New Mexico

  I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.

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  (575): I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm. http://tfl.nu/2mds
  Replies (8) Good night (1554) Bad night (1501)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.

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  (763): The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins. http://tfl.nu/k74l
  Replies (8) Good night (2690) Bad night (923)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.

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  (314): For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos. http://tfl.nu/t7k7
  Replies (11) Good night (4686) Bad night (1256)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."

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  (530): We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out." http://tfl.nu/0tb5
  Replies (3) Good night (3770) Bad night (1003)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.

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  (269): I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now. http://tfl.nu/er1x
  Replies (7) Good night (1323) Bad night (756)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?

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  (910): So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding? http://tfl.nu/hdxw
  Replies (4) Good night (1270) Bad night (671)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...

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  (919): So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea... http://tfl.nu/bj54
  Replies (6) Good night (589) Bad night (1606)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  just found out that she named her cat after me.

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  (612): just found out that she named her cat after me. http://tfl.nu/gcoa
  Replies (4) Good night (417) Bad night (886)
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.

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  (571): I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me. http://tfl.nu/vbgb
  Replies (2) Good night (759) Bad night (333)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap

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  (615): Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap http://tfl.nu/hboz
  Replies (0) Good night (444) Bad night (257)

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