i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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