The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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