check it out our google latitudes are spooning
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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