only if we run a train.
done.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
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i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
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