im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize