She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
