is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
