I wish I only lived at night.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
did i just pee glitter
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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