Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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