In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Couch. On fire.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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