like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
So much rum. So many feels.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
