Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
