Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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